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Step 1

Get physical and see how he responds. If you are intimate with him and he doesn’t respond or takes a long time to respond, he may not be as attracted to women as you thought. If you are not yet intimate with each other, get physical by holding his hand or other forms of touching. If he doesn’t seem to want you to touch him, it’s a dead giveaway.

Step 2

Pay attention to what he talks about. Does he talk about the way he looks a lot? Does he seem more sensitive than other men you know? If your boyfriend is obsessive about his appearance, loves to talk about feelings and seems to always know how you are feeling, it’s possible that he’s gay.

Step 3

Notice what he notices. Straight men are notorious for not noticing small things like new nail polish, a haircut or a new pair of shoes. If your boyfriend always notices things like this, he may be gay.

Step 4

Listen to the way he talks about gay people. Does he get irate about gay issues? If so, he may be trying too hard to convince people that he isn’t gay when he’s already begun to suspect that he might be.

Step 5

Tell him what you suspect about him. If you want the relationship to continue and you can’t shake the feeling that he’s gay, telling about your feeling will either get him to confirm that he’s gay or make you feel better by getting your reservations out in the open. This could, of course, make him angry enough to break up with you. But if you still can’t shake the feeling that he’s gay, that’s probably for the best for both of you.